Friday, March 19, 2010

Support. defines the word support as follows. bear or hold up (a load, mass, structure, part, etc.); serve as a foundation for. sustain or withstand (weight, pressure, strain, etc.) without giving way; serve as a prop for. undergo or endure, esp. with patience or submission; tolerate. sustain (a person, the mind, spirits, courage, etc.) under trial or affliction maintain (a person, family, establishment, institution, etc.) by supplying with things necessary to existence; provide for. uphold (a person, cause, policy, etc.) by aid, countenance, one's vote, etc.; back; second. maintain or advocate (a theory, principle, etc.). corroborate (a statement, opinion, etc.) act with or second (a lead performer); assist in performance

I support my husband in each of these ways. I give him a foundation from which to start each day. I withstand a lot for him. I tolerate him. I sustain him. I maintain him and uphold him. I advocate for him and corroborate his belief in himself and others. I am his second. I support my husband.

New Girl on Post wrote today of questioning why our soldiers are asked to fight. Why are they asked to bear such a high cost on both themselves and their families. Why? I do not have an answer. But I also don't think it's necessarily a question I should dwell on. My soldier fights because he is willing. He is willing to lay down his life for the good of others and a country he believes in. He bears the cost that is asked of him because others cannot. He does what he does because he believes it is the right thing to do. And I support him in this.

I understand the question. And I understand why we choose to ask it. I just don't think it's a question I as a military spouse have the luxury of asking. I am here. I am married to a solider. And I support him. It's too late for me to second guess the position we are in because we are already in it and my husband is standing proud.

I don't allow myself to hold on to self-pity or fear because I support my husband and in that choice, I also choose to support what he holds dear. I may not always agree with him, but I support him. I cannot question why my husband fights because I cannot question my husband. He fights. And I support him.


  1. I can't say I've read the dictionary in a while, but those definitions truly to hit the nail on the head, don't they. Mil spouses are everything they need to be for their spouses.

    I think you should also write a post about the flip duty plays the supporting cast for thier military spouse. I know I've felt held up, maintained, sustained, tolerated, and advocated for by Scott. And sometimes its a pleasant surprise. But he is my foundation the same as I am his. Marriage is as much about this as love.

  2. My parents were in the military. My dad was in Vietnam. I was born on an Air Force Base. My grandfather, great grandfather, countless uncles and cousins were/are all military (I have one cousin whose made 3 tours of duty to Iraq). I've never questioned why they served. I've only been grateful that they did. Without them we wouldn't be where we are today.

  3. This is a fantastic post! Everything you said is right on. I was/am very proud of my brother for serving our country as long as he did.